72 Reasons On Why You Shouldn’t Read This Post But Probably Will

72 Reasons On Why You Shouldn’t Read This Post But Probably Will

1. You actually read number one, bad fucking choice friend.
2. Look at this gif of a cat:


3. Look at this gif of my dick (just kidding)
4. Fuck school I mean just look at this deep statement from a Facebook status:


5. You made it to five, congrats.
6. “Kill People, Burn Shit, Fuck School,” I agree Tyler, I agree:

7. What is the meaning of life? Is it to be an ultra feminist? Or to be an ultra neoconservative? Or to be an extremist in any sense? The world may never fucking know.
8. Subreddit Spacedicks is my favorite subreddit on Reddit. (http://www.reddit.com/r/spacedicks)

9. I’m personally a big fan of Buzzfeed, howboutu? (Fucking WordPress formatting is a bitch, rite?)

10. You made it to ten and you know what that means? Absolutely fucking nothing, kid.
11. Empathy is on the brink of extinction…or have humans always been shitty? (probs)
12. Can someone actually tell me what any of this list is supposed to mean?
13. Wait, is this like easy to consume, fast knowledge for those who claim to be smart but probably haven’t picked up a book in years?
14. Shit, I think the last guy might be right, that’s exactly what this is, this list is-
15. It’s an excuse, an excuse to waste time, an excuse to-
16. Seem smart-
17. Shit, that’s crazy, man.
18. Eighteen bitch
19. LOL LOOK IT’S ANOTHER CAT:


20. LOL LOOK MUSTACHES ISN’T IT FUNNY CUZ LOLSORANDOM:


21. LOL LOOK BACON ISN’T IT FUNNY CUZ BACON TASTE GOOD:


22. LOL LOOK POP-TARTS AND HOTPOCKETS, IT’S LIKE I’M REFERENCING THE LAST POST I MADE:


23. LOL-shut the fuck up, man, stop typing in all caps.
24. SORRY.
25. DID YOU NOT-
26. Now you are…
27. FUCK YOU.
28. DAMMIT, THAT’S REALLY MEAN.
29. Sorry.
30. I love you.
31. Love you too.
32. Now kith:


33. If gay people can get married doesn’t that make it okay for people to fuck ducks?
Absolutely that makes it okay to fuck ducks, those things are totally comparable according to the good old church…I think?
34. I’ve never actually read a bible honestly.
35. Swag
36. Swag
37. Swag
38. Swag
39. Swag

40. SHUT THE FUCK UP-

41. SWAG (ignore the shitty formatting right here, it’s how I roll)

42. SWAG
43. Whatever man.
44. SWAG
45. *Sigh*
46. Are you actually still here?
47. Like honestly?
48. Why haven’t you just killed yourself?
49. You are actually reading this list?
50. Like unironically? (did I use that right?)
51. This shit is getting ridiculous.
52. Go read a book.
53. Stop wasting your time.
54. Life is short, man.
55. And you’re wasting it, brah.
56. STOP GIVING ME ADVICE IF I WANNA SPEND MY LIFE ON TWITTER UPDATING PEOPLE ON MY POINTLESS (shitty) LIFE I WILL, OKAY?
57. Okay, calm the fuck down.
58. NO, I JUST WANNA READ THIS BUZZFEED LIST.
59. This isn’t even Buzzfeed.
60. YES IT IS.
61. It’s a fucking parody.
62. I DUNNO WHAT THAT MEANS.
63. Of course you don’t.
64. WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?
65. You’re a pseudo-intellectual, dumb, obtrusive, awful human being who probably doesn’t even know what empathy is and you’re probably offended by nearly everything.
66. A-WHAT???!?!??
67. Exactly you airhead.
68. I LOVE CANDY.
69. Dumbass.
70. We hit 70, kids.
71. And do you know what that means?
72. IT MEANS 90s KIDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! RITE?:


73. *sigh*
74. Wait, we went pass 72.
75. Fuck it.
76. Who cares?
77. Dammit.
78. I hate this shit.
79. Fuck Buzzfeed
80. “Let It Go” (this is popular with the kids, rite?):

 

One thought on “72 Reasons On Why You Shouldn’t Read This Post But Probably Will

  1. we live in a world of lolcats and reverse psychologies
    a repost culture vulture that twerks with no apologies
    man feeds on the buzz and jacks off to pseudo-philosophies
    the study of man is but one of many zoologies

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